Make the Memories Now

I recently had a retinal detachment where about a quarter of the vision in my right eye disappeared into a black hole. By itself, it was a very scary episode. My vision now is almost back to where it was before this happened. But it did give me a taste of what could be in my future if my macular degeneration progresses further.

Confronting progression

I have choroidal neovascular (wet) macular degeneration in my left eye, and the dry form in my right eye. My anti-VEGF injections are holding the line in my left eye with just a little distortion. My right eye is very gradually worsening. I'm getting more, and very slightly darker, smudges in the center of my vision.

So I know it’s happening. It now depends on how fast it progresses. I am following all the suggestions to help slow it down. The AREDS 2, a healthy diet, sunglasses. But it doesn’t depend only on my preventive actions. There are times when no matter how hard we try, our bodies have their own timelines.

Surviving, not thriving

This retinal detachment has been my wake-up call, my epiphany. It showed me what I might be looking forward to in my future. The times when I couldn’t read (or could only use one eye) were interminable. The times when I couldn’t go for a walk were frustrating.

I learned I may need to change how I’m able to do things. I’m going to do it now, as they say. Before I may not be able to, or put more correctly, not be able to on my own. Living alone, I depend on myself. My children have their own lives, happily there for me when needed, but I don’t want to take advantage of them.

The "someday" trap

The pandemic has held me back from a number of the things I had always planned to do “someday”. Cancel the trip, postpone the class. Now it’s time to get started. Whether it’s the little things like coffee meetings with a group of friends, or bigger plans such as a cruise or a road trip while I can still drive and enjoy every new view, every new experience.

I have always wanted to do a walking tour of Ireland. It’s time to make some new memories. I have already started with a new line dancing class, a good way to get the joints moving.

I know I can still enjoy a good, full life even if my central vision deteriorates. Most things can be done in different ways to achieve the same result. But some require better eyesight to experience them to the fullest. So I’m starting today.

As Lewis Carroll said, “In the end, we only regret the chances we didn’t take, relationships we were afraid to have, and the decisions we waited too long to make.”

Thriving with macular degeneration

Get out the sewing machines, toss the dark fabric and make that art quilt. Grab the passport, the camera, hop in the car and take that long-delayed road trip. However good (or bad) our vision is, whether it is stable or worsening, we need to enjoy those memory-making opportunities while we can. Make some memories. Do it now.

Have you had a wake-up call? Are you taking advantage of every bit of sight you do have?