Life Is a Journey... Not a Guided Tour

Life is a journey, not a guided tour...

Once upon a time, perhaps back in the 1980s, that phrase seemed to be everywhere. From note cards to coffee cups, we were reminded that there was no road map, no itinerary, no instruction book to follow. Depending on your perspective, that meant “Right on!” or “Ugh.”

Guiding mottos

And then sometime in the last decade, the omnipresent phrase became “life is what happens while you plan for it.”

Both seem to capture the reality of the aging process; the yin and yang of life. We want order (the guided tour) and the quest; predictability and adventure.

Many people prefer the guided tour, the fixed and familiar itinerary. Then disease (AMD) or disaster (or the current pandemic), finds them racing down an unfamiliar road as it collapses beneath them.

When your vision doesn't align with your vision

My macular degeneration diagnosis and its intrusion into my daily life have been very good at teaching me to cast aside the guided tour and not sweat the planning.

Small adjustments make a big difference

The most drastic change was a seemingly small one. I had to train myself to look through the viewfinder on my fancy camera with my good right eye. Now I am most likely to use my cellphone to take photos and the results are remarkably good.

In the past year and a half, old patterns have changed. I have learned to use a larger font size and double spacing for my writing. I am now devout both in taking my vitamins and in checking the Amsler grid. Sunglasses and a wide-brimmed hat are with me outdoor. Carrots and beets and kale are my new favorite foods.

Life is a journey

As Thanksgiving approached, the order of the familiar gave way to a form of adventure. We were to have the day with one other person but when that went from three to five, we decided against going, for safety’s sake. Will our hostess friend be upset? If we don’t go out, what about the big meal? If it is just the two of us, should we eat at home? Cook or carry out?

Living in the moment

We looked down the path of the journey and set our own rules. There would be the two of us at home. We set a beautiful table with flowers and candles and the best dinnerware and family silver. We talked with friends and family. Then we got dressed up and sat down to a meal of mashed sweet potatoes, peas, dressing, great wine, and turkey, of course. But, turkey burgers! My husband has a dental condition that makes soft foods or small bites a better choice than sliced turkey.

Planning on the guided tour next year

Maybe next year we’ll be in a big group and have the menu prescribed for the usual guided tour, the Norman Rockwell version of Thanksgiving. And maybe it will be another unplanned detour on my journey here or in Italy or with friends and family somewhere far away.