AMD and Me

By suegoslak

1 min read

As a child I was born with crossed eyes.

This was a long time ago as I am now 77. I had amblyopia. I have no depth perception. I would run into walls and break my glasses. I stood too close to a kid hitting balls with a baseball bat and got a scar o my forehead. I had to sit at the teacher's desk to see the blackboard. I need to be in the front row to see what is going on.

Hobbies I still enjoy

I went to college and got a masters degree. I have written four fiction books. I have created art works in different media. I sew and crochet. I love to read. As a child I always thought that someday I would be blind. PreserVision is keeping the progression of my disease from going too fast.

Blurry vision and cataracts

When I had cataracts removed, my right eye (the good one) got another cataract. It is blurry all the time, but my Dr. is afraid that if it is removed it will exacerbate the AMD. I am afraid that when I go to take my next driver's test I will fail (came close last time). Getting to be this old has taken a toll on me, but if I lose color vision or become legally blind.

I say that I will take my life, but what I will probably do is just sit in my recliner and be depressed all the time. This disease, as they all are, is very hard to live with and I am not one of those people who is resilient enough to be positive about it. I will just give up.

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abbyschmidt Community Admin
Hi <inline-mention username="suegoslak" user-id="8847615"/>! Thanks so much for taking the time to submit a story about your day-to-day life with macular degeneration. From what you wrote, it sounds like you're still finding nice ways to spend your time and enjoy your hobbies. I can understand that some days probably feel really heavy, and that depression can take over, but taking the time to be a part of our community is a huge step. We are here to provide you with support, uplift you, and help you feel that resilient on your toughest days! Please continue to let us know how you're feeling and if there are any resources we can provide you with. Thinking of you, Abby (Team Member).
1. Sharon Moore Moderator
 suegoslak Thank you for sharing your story with the community. You have overcame so many challenges since a young age. I do understand your feeling about coping with future loss. It can be daunting to deal with each days challenges. I find the only way I can’t handle the declining health issues my husband and I have is to focus on each days issue and not on an unpredictable future. I recently visited a low vision clinic for evaluation. I learned about bioptic glasses that may help me continue to drive when I would not otherwise qualify. Please reach out anytime. Warmly, Sharon Moore patient leader
Blue Lady Member
Hello Suegoslak, I can understand that losing your color vision and not being able to do your artwork as before is a great loss and so daunting to deal with. I have been diagnosed with myopic Choroidalneovascularization, the symptoms which are much like Intermediate stage AMD. It came on suddenly. I am losing colors too. I gave up reading so as not to strain my 'good' eye, I have wavy lines in my vision and a grey blurry spot in central vision. I no longer make jewelry and I am afraid to go out on my eBike. You have accomplished much in your life and I can understand that you don't wish to be a couch potato either that is no life and you are a creative person. Is it possible to write another book with the new technology out there? Such as speaking to print? I know there is apps out there for Apple IPhone. But if there is something for you on the computer you can use to write and then print out? I know there is computer art out there too that would be a new learning curve if you can. Something to look into. ( AI is very controversial ). Hope for the best and take care. 
1. Sharon Moore Moderator
 <inline-mention username="Blue Lady" user-id="8884115"/> thank you for supporting this community member with some nifty ideas for new ways to create art. AI is controversial but here to stay. You mentioned straining your eye reading. I didn’t realize that was possible. I will get my retinal specialist take on that issue next week. I love to read but I don’t want to hurt my eyes. Warm wishes, Sharon Moore patient leader
Blue Lady Member
Hello Sharon Moore, yes I think it is possible for me to strain my eyes because of my particular diagnosis. Being severely myopic and working on small details and reading too much exasperates the myopia and can cause this to happen. I wish I had known this could happen. I would have prepared somehow I think. I worry about computer screens too, I spend too much time on it sometimes. My eyes hurt afterwards and my good eye gets blurrier. I am 73 and I don't know how I will live now, I was interested in art and Yoga when I was a young person. Maybe I can do Yoga again and Meditation too. I will have to try a different kind of art/ style also. I am trying hard to adjust and transition to a whole new way of living. I hope my vision holds out for many more years. And I hope the same for you and I hope Suegoslak can hang in there. Lilli