Hand painting a melting clock

My Masterpiece

People have so many different and amazing talents. I have enjoyed watching Mandy Harvey as she conquers her difficulties being deaf and successfully singing. Her loss of hearing hit her at age 18 through an illness. Music was her everything, so the idea of losing it was almost too much, but through perseverance and determination, she found her way into the music world. Finding help with visual tuners, she launched a successful singing career.

Recently, she was a part of a YouTube special about disability employment awareness. Her singing was very captivating, and it touched me when she said, “Your masterpiece may never be done.”

Adjusting my life around new challenges

Macular degeneration has added an extra chapter to my book. It brings challenges and fears as I navigate my own life. Being able to do things and maintain a life that I knew I could be successful in has always been something I treasured.

Macular degeneration threatens that feeling, and I find that I, at times, doubt myself in my everyday life. It can be something as simple as not being able to read the labels on a bottle in a store or as big as giving up driving at night, thus limiting evening opportunities. Being dependent is certainly a new direction, and I am constantly adjusting to its constraints.

MD can feel like a race against time

In this dependent pattern of being, I still work hard at being creative, drawing, painting, and sketching anything and everything I can. I strive to create that new project and work on it until it is right. The hard part is knowing when to stop and call it good, accepting the final results, signing that right-hand corner, and putting the project down to start something new.

Some days I find myself working on many projects and wondering, “What am I doing? Why am I rushing to finish so many canvases and pages?” At times, I pile up new pieces faster than I admit. Am I in a race against time? Am I subconsciously trying to beat the clock and win this race against time before a time comes that I may not be able to do this anymore?

My masterpiece may never be done

In the back of my mind, I am looking to complete my “masterpiece.” Creating that piece of work that stops people in awe, drawing praise and applause over some work that I did.

I am thinking a new way of living may be in order, a new direction as I continue this art life of mine. Working with the obstacles of degeneration, I need to realize that there is always one more project, painting, or drawing waiting in my mind. I need to utilize my abilities to see what I can see now and grow with it. I need to accept that my masterpiece may never be done and relish the process of creating each piece along the way.

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