Dialectical Behavioral Therapy
Monday, they “rotor rooted” my right Achilles’ tendon. I had developed tendinosis, a severe form of tendinitis, and my Achilles had become “mooshy.” The doctor cleaned out the moosh with an instrument that had “cutting blades” and suction, i.e., a mini rotor rooter sort of thing. I am now in a boot.
I have taken Zumba sitting on an exercise ball and yoga on a chair. Not the way I like to exercise and certainly not as strenuous as I would like. However, given my booted state, these were the best I could do in the current situation.
I got called a “trooper” twice yesterday. I don’t see it. I just see myself willing to do what I need to do to get what I want.
Cutting off your own nose to spite your face
Believe me, I am very familiar with the term “cutting off your own nose to spite your face.” My mother accused me of that more than once while I was growing up. What the phrase refers to is causing yourself harm and not getting anything you want because you are insisting that everyone else, including the Universe, do it your way.
Take it from this totally stubborn and focused person - I had to laugh the other week when one close acquaintance told me she had been warned “Sue is on a mission!" (They know me well! 😝). I know from personal experience that trying to bull your way through when something is simply not possible, will end in frustration and disappointment.
Dialectical Behavior Therapy
So, in Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) terms, I am being willing. I am accepting the limitations that have been placed on me so that I can still continue at least a semblance of my usual life and activities.
I am also, in DBT terms, turning my mind every time I come to a choice point. Do I admit defeat and stay home? Do I leave my boot home and try to dance on this ankle? Or do I go, wear my boot, and do what I can? Do I get out of the pool and run upstairs sans boot or do I stop and put it on? Every time I come to a place that I have to make a decision, I stop and think and try hard to make the right one.
It is not easy. There have been a dozen times a day I want to throw my hands up and do what I want to do. Unfortunately, while that type of behavior may work in the short run, in the long run, it will not get me what I want.
So here I am, in a boot. Temporary inconvenience, hopefully for permanent improvement. What temporary inconvenience would you be willing to put up with to see permanent - or at least long-term improvement?
DBT and vision loss
In the four and a half years, I have been legally blind, I have had to adopt a variety of changes. I no longer drive. I cannot read more than a page or two at a time. I cannot see faces. For each of these, I have had to adopt inconvenient changes, workarounds to get my goals met.
Yet, every once in a while, I run into someone with vision loss who does not want to use the little “inconveniences” I use every day. They do not seem to be willing to accept less than what they always had. They are, in short, cutting off their own noses to spite their faces.
So here I am. One more week in the boot to go. Temporary inconvenience hopefully leading to permanent improvement. How about you?
Do you still drive?